Though discipline is not a very happy thing for kids, however without it, their upbringing would not be complete, and they will behave like a feral animal, but that doesn’t mean that as a parent we forget our children’s age and start to treat them like an adult. Although in our modern world, parents are full of tolerance, energy, understanding, and flexibility. Even in tough times, we must analyze our children’s behaviour and act accordingly, aside from all these we must remember that nobody is perfect. So to avoid some parenting mistakes, you need to enhance your practical understanding.
Parenting Issues and How to Correct the Parenting Mistakes?
Parenting is a tough job; being a parent, you are inundated by endless responsibilities and work pressure. To juggle the role of a parent besides other duties is quite a task. But it doesn’t mean we have the freedom to treat our kids as we want. Kids are more sensitive than we grown-ups, they get hurt easily, and sometimes the dent they get in their heart never leaves them anywhere in their lives; they keep on holding bad memories, further hurting themselves; in worst cases, they pass the same to their children. So, be sensitive when it comes to children, stay away from parenting mistakes.
1. Giving Long Lectures and Advice All the Time
Lecturing your kid is not going to give you an all-embracing outcome. They have very minimum alertness for some monotonous stuff (lecturing is often boring). Rather than lecturing your children for their lack of interest in doing homework or reluctance to attend school, a proper discussion about their problems and fear is what you should look for. As a parent, you need to learn how to adjust to the situation like; when your kid scores poor marks in his exams, instead dig for the problems your child was/is facing and help her/him score better in the next exam.
2. Do not Nag all the Time
Sometimes for parents who want to be alleviative, nagging ascents as a big problem for them. Instead of asking directly, some parents investigate or ask the same thing repeatedly, which could irritate kids. If you want answers, it is better to talk face to face, your voice needs to be firm, and requests need to be more consonant and persistent so that the ultimate outcome is more acceptable. You can also warn them of some adverse effects of their late response. Rewarding or praising them for their immediate response can make them more attentive.
3. Humiliating them
Sometimes our remarks force them to feel insecure or down etc. Before making any comments, make sure it’s not going to hurt your kid. Sometimes we warn them that we will leave them out of anger if they don’t finish our desired thing. To hurt anyone’s feeling is not acceptable, especially when it is your kid. So be careful about your words.
4. Don’t Lose Your Temper
In this stressful society, reacting unnaturally or overreacting is quite a common scenario. Such an incident could traumatize your kid, and they get confused about the whole incident. However, an apology from the core of your heart is always welcome, and it also helps to give them a lesson in human feelings as well as inaccuracy. Instead of getting angry with them, you need to transform the mood into a good one, like spending time at your nearest park with your kids or playing with them etc.
5. Yelling Hurts Kids in the Long Run
Yelling could be an option for you to make kids scared and release your frustration, but it is not the most effective way to change their behavior; in fact, shouting at kids makes the behavior problems worsen. On the other hand, it could make your kids argumentative or silent. There is a belief that usually, kids respond quite well to a calm situation. Keep your anger for some urgent situation and try to control it as much as possible because it hurts the kids in the long run.
6. Do not set Traps
Authoritarian parents always have a tendency to try and catch their children on the act and thereby prove their point of view. For example, if they find any clue about one of their kids’ friend’s smoking addictions, their immediate action is to attack their children for smoking. As a result of this attitude, what you end up having is your child becomes defensive, will lose trust in you, and start to lie and conceal facts. Instead, you should straightforwardly ask them that you are concerned about something and want to discuss it with them. Talking with them gives them the confidence to confide in you, and in this way, you will know the exact and accurate figures and facts.
7. Pushing Kids Without Pushing Too Hard
Don’t use force on your kids to fulfill your requirements. When they feel scared to visit the doctor’s chamber, you need to analyse the situation, and it better is to ask them directly about their fears instead of pushing them as a parent. Offer them various options, which can make them feel free. If you encourage them, then they can gather some courage to face the situation. Learn tricks to talk to your kids instead of pushing them for anything. Sometimes kids need pushing but knowing how to push kids without exerting too hard is your key to success.
8. Giving them the Guilt Trip
People who themselves have grown up in inappropriate condition often put their kids responsible for the consequences. Some parents foist every blame on their children without knowing the fact or situation, thus making a big mistake, sending their kids to the guilty zone. Sometimes to save themselves, some parents begin to narrate about their time zone and childhood sacrifices. Children being sensitive often faces guilt if their parents are going through an unwanted situation. Instead of taking your child on the guilt trip, you need to examine your synopsis from the very beginning. You need to realize every problem in your relationship individually. If required, you can take help from some professional who can help you to overcome your horrifying past experiences.
9. Punishing Them Physically
Out of frustration and anger, parents often hit their kids physically. Applying physical force is not at all acceptable. It can cause a massive injury to your relationship. Just to maintain the proper discipline, when you repeat this physical hitting habit on a regular basis, then get ready for the horrible outcome. Try to remember the incidents of your childhood, what was your reaction to such action. If you are confused about parenting, it’s better to take the help of a professional or try reading various magazines on parenting (which will give you a complete guideline), attend workshops, etc. Going through proper parenting methods and practicing different techniques is much better than hitting and yelling at your child.
10. Treat Kids with Love and Respect
Instead of ordering them for doing something instantly, your words need to be firm as well as respectful. Praising them for some of their good works gives you more fruitful results. You can also arrange for some rewards for them, like preparing a special breakfast or reading an extra story or taking them out for a movie night etc.
Parenting is challenging, but it is the most enjoyable experience parents can have if they take it easy. The best you can do for your kids’ betterment is working on how to correct the parenting mistakes. Know the parenting issues, do your best to seek out solutions, and try fixing parenting mistakes you are doing or you are about to do.
I love to include relevant quotes in my articles, let’s check out some quotes on parenting mistakes, parenting issues, and good parenting.
Parenting Mistakes Quotes
We have to prepare the child for the path, not the path for the child.
When you teach your son, you teach your son’s son.
Your children will reap what you sow.
A lot of parents will do anything for their kids, except let them be themselves.
I don’t think anyone can grow unless he’s loved exactly as he is now, appreciated for what he is rather than what he will be.
Don’t handicap your children by making their lives easy.
Your children need your presence more than your presents.
We cannot always build the future for our youth, but we can build our youth for the future.
Someone’s sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago.
Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed.